The calendar has turned to September and the days are noticeably shorter. Summer has passed. The changing seasons remind me how quickly time passes. I don’t want to waste it. I want to live life deliberately, and to live life well. When Jesus taught his disciples to pray, he taught his followers to simply pray for today. “Give us this day our daily bread.”
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Recently, as I was cleaning up some files, I came across a post I used in August of 2012. I remembered the post and I knew pieces of it came from a journal entry I wrote a year earlier. But reading this post anew this week, I thought, “I could have written this last week!” Allowing myself to cry is still a struggle for me. I still stifle my tears and refuse to let them fall. But in this post, I find a younger version of myself speaking to my heart today and reminding me once more that tears are a gift.
As August arrives, I know the season. I feel the heaviness begin to settle on my heart before I know the date on the calendar. Even while the heat of a summer sun still bears down on me, I feel it in the breeze that rustles the Johnson grass with its Auburn seeded heads towering on either side of the road. And I see it as I drive past rows of bushy, green cotton, and shaded rows of tall, tasseled corn. I know the season and my heart once more remembers and grieves the long-ago loss of my comical, red-headed, inquisitive little boy. For many years I tried to ignore and minimize this grief, but there is a sweetness in the remembering.
Suicide. It is a topic not often talked discussed, and not a topic that I have talked about much despite its impact on my life and the lives of my children. This is the first time I have ever written about it. But suicide marks both the living and the dead. So, as I write about my experience, I am posting it in this Space for Grace as a reminder to myself and others that we cannot know what ‘secrets’ have shaped the lives of those around us.
Suicide: A Family Secret Read More »
Summer’s long days, warm sunshine, and outdoor activities are cherished, but finding balance between work and rest is hard. If we’re not intentional, we will spend all our time running through summer and no time actually being present in it. But pausing to enjoy peaceful presence can be essential to finding peace and contentment, especially in the midst of busyness.
I step outside in the dark of predawn. Sunrise is still well over an hour away, and yet as I step out and look up in wonder at the star filled sky – a black canvas dotted with billions of pinholes of light – the music of morning plays all around me, and yet, it is still dark. I pause for just a moment to listen and wonder how the birds know that dawn is near. And how can we know when dawn is near and the heavy burdens of life will lighten – at least for a season? Perhaps like the birds, we don’t know, but I’m wondering, can we sing in the dawn even while it is still dark?
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I think most of us like the places, people, and things that are familiar and comfortable. And most of us struggle – at least to some degree- to love and accept those ideas, things, and people who are different.
As I have been making my way slowly through the New Testament this year, I have recently started reading through the gospel of Luke. Of all the gospels, Luke is perhaps my favorite. As Luke records the teachings of Jesus, he seems to move from one parable to another, which makes me wonder if he too could ‘see’ the gospel in the parables of Jesus.
The Comfort of Grace Read More »
Several years ago, some dear friends treated our family to a trip to Galveston. I loved watching the waves roll in, I loved walking on the beach at sunset with my friend, I loved watching my children play in the waves, I loved swimming with the dolphins in the ocean.
But I hate to get my head wet. I hate the feel of water in my eyes, ears, and nose. Sometimes life too can feel like being dunked into cold water. I was reminded of this trip on a cold April morning as I was struggling to keep my head above water.
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As I come to my morning quiet time, the house is still and dark. I look forward to this time every morning. I come to this place and believe God will meet me here. I have faith He is enough for this moment, this day, this life.
That’s my ideal morning. But many days are not so serene. Often my thoughts are running rampant from the minute I wake up and despite my repeated attempts, I cannot seem to quiet them for more than a minute before I am once again thinking about the worries and trials that fill my small world.
I don’t often watch movies on the big screen, but not long ago I watched Jesus Revolution at the Cinemax. It made me wonder how a ‘Jesus Revolution’ might be received today. It is easy while we are sitting in a movie theater to cheer for the underdog and to think we would respond just like Pastor Chuck Smith and welcome and support the hippie-street-preacher. But the movement and the people might look a little different in our current culture than it did in the 60’s and 70’s.
A Different Love – A Revolutionary Love Read More »